Stacy Valentine was a porn star from the late 90′s. She retired from porn in 2000.

Her site will really only be interesting to her most dedicated fans. There is very little actual porn content. The few photos are old, small and poor quality (or scanned magazine photos). Even the newer snapshots are small and poor quality. And ALL of the movie clips are broken.

She has retired from porn and now only does appearances at events so the only new content you’ll see are snapshots from events. She doesn’t even have a blog, diary, or news page, so I don’t understand why the price is so high.

There is one pre-checked cross sale at checkout with no information as to what rate that “free trial” will rebill at once it is over, so the likelihood of getting charged double is very high.

$1/trial (NO TIME LENGTH GIVEN)

$29.81/month

$49.95/3 months

Visit stacyvalentine.com then come back and tell us how awful it is!

Who is Kimberly Kupps?

Well, I suppose she is a washed up porn star with giant fake tits and a shitty old website that hasn’t been updated in half a decade.

Kimberly Kupps thinks she is super awesome and that you should join her fan club!

For only $100 per year you can get:

  • One Personal Phone Call from Kimberly Kupps.
  • One of Your Favorite Kimberly  Kupps Erotic Videos.
  • One 8×10 Autographed Photo (Custom Pose).
  • One Pair of Kimberly’s Freshly Worn Panties.
  • Gold Membership Card.

That’s right, A SOLID GOLD MEMBERSHIP CARD.

Ok…it is probably plastic, but just imagine how impressed all your middle aged buddies would be when you whip out your gold Kimberly Kupps membership card to prove that not only are you stupid, but also a huge loser!

In case you were wondering, that $100 does not get you access to the website. You need to pay $19.95 a month for that. AND if you want to watch some of her videos you can pay per minute in amazing real video format.

Visit KimberlyKupps.com

Sydnee Steele appeared in about 300 films before retiring in 2005. She stopped updating her site the year before she retired.

The live video button just takes you to a list of cam sites. The auctions link is broken. The movies are broken. The only things that work on the site are the old journal entries and the photos.

$29.95/month recurring

While it appears that the site is still accepting payment, I discovered that you actually don’t even need a password to enter the members area.

Visit syndeesteele.com then come back and tell us how awful it is!

VisitApril.com is a site dedicated to porn star April Flowers. Aside from being a generally crappy site that hasn’t been updated since 2004, it completely rips you off by just pulling all the content from a free site.

That is right, for $29.95 a month you get access to everything you see here. Go ahead and check it out, it’s free. No need to pay $29.95

Jennifer Korbin is an accomplished model and actress who has been in Playboy, Maxim, and numerous other publications.

Her website could almost be cool if she worked harder to keep it updated and interact with her fans, but it kind of fails at that. The news and updates section gives you a month/day for the date, but not a year. So it only eventually becomes apparent that most of what she is talking about happened years ago.

Content is pretty sparse and she has a little bit too much dedicated to her pets…

It is not clear but I think the last update was August 2009.

Price: $16.95 for the first month $14.95 each month after.

Visit JenniferKorbin.com

Nicole Moore was lucky enough to have her site designed by the same horrible abomination of a web design company that did Cumisha’s Web.

Yep, you are greeted with audio clips you can not turn off and annoying ugly animations everywhere you go. You also get to experience a wonderful “space” theme as Nicole welcomes you to “her galaxy.”

Nicole got a lot of attention from Howard Stern and others early on because she offered a nude house painting service. Yes, for only $500 + $45 per square foot she will fuck up your walls like this.

That’s not all that Nicole offers on her site. For a “nominal fee” you can star in your very own porno with Nicole! That’s right. Nicole isn’t like other snobby porn stars that will only work with other professionals. She will shoot a movie with any random Joe off the street with enough $ to pay for……wait. This sounds kinda close to prostitution. Then you see this nice disclaimer:

THIS IS NOT TO BE CONSIDERED SOLICITATION OF SEX OR PROSTITUTION IN ANY WAY.   THIS IS A BUSINESS AGREEMENT BETWEEN BOTH PARTIES TO PERFORM WHILE MAKING A VIDEO.

Really? A business agreement? Will the video appear on Nicole’s website? No. Will it appear on a website owned by the guy paying for it? No, because the guy is not a pornographer.

Well let’s say you want to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume it really is pay for performance and not pay for sex. Well, then you can go on to the ESCORTING button on her site.

You can hire Nicole Moore to go on a date with you! Only $1000 per hour, $8000 per night, $14,000 for a weekend or $25,000 per week!

What do you think you will be doing all week if you give her 25 grand? I am sure not just hanging out and watching tv. Personally, I think that prostitution should be legalized. I don’t have a moral problem with it. But, prostitution is currently illegal and when prostitutes try to come off as porn stars (or porn stars cross over into prostitution) it creates problems for the industry as a whole. Conservatives work harder to regulate and shut down porn and it is easy to do if they can pull up a porn site and show everyone it is only a front for prostitution.

It also gives people the false impression that ANY woman who is naked on the Internet will fuck you if you give her money.

Now, let’s say that you are a big fan of Nicole Moore anyway and you don’t care if she is a whore. Her site is still not the place to go. All you get is access to about a dozen shitty videos and a wallpaper inside.

$29.95 a month

Click here to visit NicoleMoore.net

Cumisha Amado started her porn career in 1990. By the time she started her website in 1999 I would say her career was pretty much over. However, she kept going for a good stretch making appearances, shooting random stuff and updating her site until about 2007 when her last entry is in the “news” section is.

The content is typical of most old websites. 29 sets of low resolution low quality photos and tiny crappy videos. Even the videos labelled “DSL / Cable” are super small and you can barely see what is going on.

The best part about this site that makes it so awful is all the charming things that people got to experience back in the day. The handy netscape navigator link, the awful sound of a voice speaking to you with no way to stop it on various pages, and all sorts of annoying animations and sounds. At the bottom of each page it says that the website was designed by MK MultiMedia You should really check out their website to see their horrible intro and sales pitches on all the shitty animations they were trying sell people a decade ago. (Maybe they still are?)

Cumisha, It is time to say goodbye. Please end your site.
Price: $29.95 Monthly

Click here to visit CumishasWeb.com

Raquel Devine hasn’t updated her site in 4 1/2 years–I’m shocked she still has any members around. But, they are not all happy members: “Raquel’s fame dropping or users not logging on..but damn woman..I enjoyed reading your diaries..now its filled with just calender updates.”

All of the videos are broken except the videos in the ‘extra videos’ section, but those are all just videos that are free for everyone on xvideos.com anyway.

Only one pricing option: $24.95/5 day trial (recurring at $24.95/month)

Isn’t the trial period supposed to be low in price to entice you to see the site THEN they stick you with the high monthly recurring charge?!

Visit raqueldevine.net then come back and tell us how awful it is!

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