Sexy Lora is a sexy girl from Argentina.

How sexy is she? Well you may have a bit of trouble finding out because after you pay $26.95 to enter the site, you will find all the photo sets are broken.

The videos work, but there are not very many.

Oh, and the last update was in 2005

Click here to visit Sexy-Lora.com

 

ManHandledMILFS.com is dead!

Another terrible porn site killed by Awful Porn to make the Internet a better place!

Want to buy the name and make it a good site? Contact AwfulPorn@gmail.com

I am starting to really get sick of the over use and abuse of the term “MILF.”

Being a mother does not automatically make you a MILF, and being and older woman does not automatically make you a MILF. Just like being fat does not automatically make you a BBW. Also, being a porn star or a stripper reaching the end of your viable career does not automatically make you a MILF. Fake tits and a fake tan really do not look that great after a certain age. The term MILF should not even be used in porn at all. It’s something you say when you are out with your buddies and you see an attractive older woman.

You know what else I am getting sick of? The fact that it is fucking 2010 and I STILL have to download movies that have been broken down into a million 1 or 2 minute clips. Can you imagine trying to watch LOST while being interrupted every minute by another minute of commercials? Would that be enjoyable? Probably not. So why the fuck do these pornographers think we like stopping our “enjoyment” of a porno every minute to download another minute?

There are an OK number of movies on this site, but not many featuring older attractive women and all of them are broken up into a bunch of little clips making it impossible to just sit back and enjoy your porn unless you download everything you want first and then make a playlist or use software to join the clips together.

Also, if you want to join this crappy site you have to shell out almost $40. Why would anyone choose to pay for this when they could pay for a good porn site and spend less money? To be fair, they do offer a free membership. But you get what you pay for, the free signup only takes you as far as the page where you have to pay money.

Price: $39.95 Monthly.

Foxxy Movies seems to have a decent amount of content of decent quality. I have no idea how often the site is updated. They seem to get much of their content from other sites and I have no idea if any of it is original/exclusive content, but whatever. These are not the reason I am reviewing this site here on awful porn. Foxxy Movies has found the biggest douchebag in porn! Not only do they have a photoset with this giant douche in it, but they describe it as awesome! Check out the photos below.

$1/3 day trial

$29.95/month

3some98


*Update February 26 2010*

VirginAlena.com is dead!

Another terrible porn site snagged by Awful Porn to make the Internet a better place!
Want to buy the name and make it a good site? Contact AwfulPorn@gmail.com

“We grew her for your pleasure!”

Well, your pleasure will be very short lived. There are just 10 photosets and 1 private album in the members area. That’s it. No archives, no videos, no webcam shows, no blog/journal/diary, no chat or email address–nothing. There are 6 pairs of pantyhose that appear to be worn by Alena prominently featured on the main page, but when you click on them, the popup says “The shop will be open within several days!!!”. Since the date at the bottom of the members page says 2004 I’m betting it has been saying that for the last 5 years.

Oh, and the pictures in the photosets are out of order. How hard can it be to put the pictures on the site in the order they were taken?? The model should be naked at the END of the set, not on page 2 and end the set fully clothed!

This site is the biggest ripoff I’ve seen in quite a while. You can go through all of the content (slowly) in less than an hour.

$29.95/30 days recurring

Visit VirginAlena.com then come back and tell us how awful it is!

*Update* Feb 26 2010 – JuliasSecrets.com is dead

Original Review Below

“THE MOST SEXY AND FUCKABLE MODEL WORLDWIDE!”

Sweet!  At last, my search is complete!  What else do they have to say about Julia and her secrets?

“WorldWide Hughest Collection of Julia’s Photos!”

Hughest?

Taste her velvety skin, splendid elastic bust, longest legs WorldWide!”

Damn, everything is WorldWide with this chick.  AND she has an elastic bust!  I was almost excited, but then the claim of having the longest legs worldwide let me down.  Because as you know, the title of “Longest Legs WorldWide” goes to Svetlana Pankratova

It only goes downhill from here.  Inside you will find one video and 17 photo sets which are viewed using a really annoying navigation.

Price: $29.95 / month or $69.95 for 3 months.

Click here to visit JuliasSecrets.com, then come back to tell us how awful it is!

Yes, we are nerds and had to make this joke.

404Hoe.com is dead!

Another terrible porn site snagged by Awful Porn to make the Internet a better place!

Want to buy the name and make it a good site? Contact AwfulPorn@gmail.com

When I first saw the domain ’404hoe.com’ I thought it might be something to do with the ’404 error’ message. That would have been much cooler than what it actually refers to: terrible amateur porn shot in Atlanta (404 is the Atlanta area code).

It is a bland white page with mismatched thumbnails that take you to an index list of .JPG files without thumbnails so you have no idea what they are until you click on them. All of the videos seem to be short clips of the same movie. And all of the pictures seem to be of the same session as well. Clicking on what appear to be more galleries just takes you to other pay sites or lists of porn sites.

$12.95/month recurring

LaraBond.com is dead!

Another terrible porn site snagged by Awful Porn to make the Internet a better place!

Want to buy the name and make it a good site? Contact AwfulPorn@gmail.com

 

“LaraBond.com – Formerly known as Lara Bond”
What?

“Last Update: May 1st – The Next Update will be in 2 weeks “

I am not sure but I think that is May 2004. It might be safe to assume that there will be no more updates.

It gets even better..

“ATTENTION !!! – DON´T TRY TO WATCH THE MOVIE CLIPS RIGHT AWAY – THEY WILL NOT RUN PROPERLY !!!

YOU HAVE TO DOWNLOAD THE MOVIE FILES TO YOUR HARDDISK – ONCE DOWNLOADED YOU CAN WATCH THEM IN YOUR REAL PLAYER

IF YOU DO NOT HAVE THE FREE REAL PLUGIN DOWNLOAD IT FOR FREE AT Real.com

THE MOVIE CLIPS WILL BE ONLINE 2 WEEK AND ONLY 2 WEEK – YOU WILL SEE BI WEEKLY 6 NEW ONES DURING VACATION TIME”

Huh? Vacation time? And Real Player? Come on…this is not 1998.

There are similar warnings elsewhere about photos only being on one week at a time. I am guessing the person is trying to say that he rotates the content.

The navigation is horrible. When you go to select models or movies there are no thumbnails so it is a surprise to see what you are getting each time.

A couple of the movie links just take you to a pay per view movie site.

What a terribly awful lame site.

Price: $26.95 Monthly

Click here to visit LaraBond.com, then come back to tell us how awful it is!

RealDollPics.com is dead!

Another terrible porn site snagged by Awful Porn!
The Internet is now a better place :)
Want to buy the name and make it a good site? Contact AwfulPorn@gmail.com

Most everyone (I think) has heard of the Real Doll the worlds most realistic and expensive love doll. Although “realistic” does not mean “life like”. Real dolls are only for guys who can’t get a real woman, or just prefer a cold dead look in someone’s eyes and don’t want to have to kill someone every time they have sex.

So some guy who really likes his real dolls decided to dress them up in different outfits and have sex with them while taking POV style photos.

REALLY.

FUCKING.

CREEPY.

That is about all I have to say.

Oh, and there are only about a dozen photo sets which have not  been updated since 2001.

Price: $10.95 Monthly.

Copyright 2004 - 2010 AwfulPorn.com Suffusion theme by Sayontan Sinha